It’s been almost a year

And I’ve gained more weight than I’ve ever gained before. I did really well after btw was born, but then he got sick and summer was here and I started eating ice cream and chips and playing FarmVille all day. I’m so sick of being disgusting. I’m not even a cute full-figured lady. I’m just a big, fat, cow. I’ve gained 10 pounds since he came out of the hospital. It’s so hard with Tom because he suggests things like tacos from ElLoco, Bratwurst, pizza, and chili. But I just don’t care. I’ll make what I want. And if I plan my meals ahead of time, then I won’t have to ask him what he wants. I miss clothes. And shoes. And feeling good naked. I’m uncomfortable all the time. I can’t exercise because I’m so fat. I’m 5’6″ and 175 to some days 180 pounds. What sucks the most is that when I was younger I ate like shit, drank all the time and was 10-20 pounds less than I am now. Whatever. Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels. Bottom line. End of story. I’m a mom. I’m not going to be a gross mom.

I’m trying the military diet starting tomorrow. I’m sure it will work for a minute and then I’ll slip right back into my bad ways.


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